A mom’s email: The Transforming Power of “Discipline that Connects™”
Dear Jim & Lynne,
I have been reading your new book, “Discipline that Connects™” and was blessed by your teaching as I was just driving my kid’s home from my parent’s house and feeling so thankful yet again to have come into contact with you. Here’s what happened:
My 4 year old pitched a fit when we were leaving Papa and Nana’s house. Normally, I would have angrily demanded that he obey me and get in the van and come home. Then I would have spanked him for the attitude he had as we were leaving. This time, I kept calm, and let him cry it out for awhile to get out some of his feelings before we left.
After a few minutes I found him with his head in a corner and sweetly put my hand on him and looked him in the eye. I said, “Son, it’s really hard to say goodbye to Papa and Nana isn’t it?” (he had been insisting that he was going to go on the airplane with them to Arizona this afternoon to see where they were going and was NOT going to come home with me.) He looked at me, turned his back to me, and then quickly ran out the door and into the van with a tearful goodbye to my mom as he ran. It was amazing. He cried all the way home and when we got inside, he ran into my arms for a hug and I told him I loved him and he squeezed my arms and said “thank you mommy.”
Wow! What a transformation in me! And what a beautiful ending to a really hard time for him. Praise God!
My six-year-old later asked, “How come you smile now whenever we mess up and you’re disciplining us?”
I simply responded, “Because I love you!”
My kids are definitely adjusting to a new kind of mommy! We have been moving in this direction for awhile, but it’s very helpful to have some specific tools for relating. Of all of the child-rearing methods we’re taught, I so appreciate that you compel us to calm down and rely on the Holy Spirit. It makes so much sense to rely on the best resource of all, and turn to Jesus for help! Walking by faith as we parent…what a concept!
Thanks, and God Bless,