Do Warnings Teach Kids to Be Less Responsible?
0When dealing with a misbehaving child, many parents follow this pattern: instruction, warning, warning, last warning, really strong last warning, angry explosion!! When we stretch out our instructions into multiple warnings and don’t follow through, it teaches our children to feel insecure under our guidance. …
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The Best Plan for Teaching Faith!
We had it all figured out. With strong desire to be more intentional about teaching faith at home, we’d put together a little lesson plan for a family Bible study. Complete with some fun object lessons and activities, it was sure to be a hit! …
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What to Do When We Blow Up
As hard as we try to parent like God would, we are human, and sometimes we mess up. We lose our cool, we speak harshly, or sometimes we even blow up at our kids. See how one mom handled her blow-up: The boys wouldn’t stop …
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When Kids Reject Affection, Don’t Give Up!
Parents love to connect with their children. But it’s not always so easy. Some children (whether tots or teens) respond to their parents’ affection in a way that says “‘Private property, No trespassing’ in this heart of mine.” The child may withdraw into a private world …
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Would Your Children Say You Love Them?
Have you ever asked your kids what you do to make them feel loved? It’s worth the ask and you might be surprised by their answers. Once they answer, keep working at communicating love so the kids can’t miss it! These five ideas have helped thousands …
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Did God Spank Moses?
The story of Moses at the burning bush is (thanks to Cecil DeMille and Charlton Heston) one of the most famous stories in the Old Testament (see Exodus 3 & 4). But have you ever read it as an example of parenting? In the story, …
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Why Do Kids Obsess Over Video Games?
During my recent reading of “Boys Adrift” by Dr. Leonard Sax, I came across a letter that really grabbed my attention. The letter’s author is a 27-year-old doctoral student at Notre Dame — oh, and he’s addicted to video games. I don’t think you understand …
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The Power of Questions: One Child’s Surprise Solution for Misbehavior
When kids misbehave, parents are often quick to impose consequences. We’ve found that when parents instead ask kids questions about how they want help, the kids often come up with some pretty cool ideas. When they contribute to solutions, children are much more likely to …
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How to Deal with an Attention Addict
Recently, on a weekend when all our kids were home, we dug out the family videos for a trip down memory lane (or, in the case of our daughter-in-law, a crash-course in Jackson family history). Their antics were rather hilarious – particularly their clumsy attempts …
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What’s REALLY Behind Kids’ Misbehavior?
Have you ever noticed that some kids argue more persuasively than others? Or that some kids’ schemes are actually quite creative? Or that some kids’ resistance to our requests is so persistent that we actually give in to them sometimes?
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The Year of “Discipline that Connects”
“What should I do?” When parents come to us for help they ask the same question. It’s a really important question. But there is no one right answer. What works for one parent may not work for another. What works today may not work tomorrow. …
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Parenting Resolutions You Can Keep!
Happy 2013! As you think about the year ahead, and plans or resolutions you’re making for a better future, we invite you to consider making some high-impact Parenting Resolutions. First, take a minute to put your feet up. Take a breath. Ask the Lord RIGHT …
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When Kids Act Up, Don’t Try to Be More Patient…
It’s time for the after-Christmas let-down. Kids haven’t figured out “sharing patterns” yet for all their cool new stuff, everyone’s jazzed on sugar and tired from disrupted sleep patterns… It’s easy to lose patience. Many parents bemoan their lack of patience for their kids’ sometimes …
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3 Steps for Success in Christmas Chaos!
Holidays and other gatherings can be a lot of fun — but they can also be busy and overstimulating for kids! Being proactive about preparing your children for challenging situations in advance can go a long way toward keeping the peace and teaching your child …
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Are We Ever Really Safe?
Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33) Humans long to be safe. We want our children to be safe. Our efforts to create safety, whatever they may be, tend to lull us into …
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Building the Family Team: A Solution to Chore Wars
7-year-old Bryce was a master “chore evader.” When asked to help with chores, this distractable drama king would slump over and whine, “But I wanted to play!” His parents, Sandy and Jeff, had run out of ideas and came to me (Lynne) for help. …
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Should We Lie to Our Kids about Santa?
Note: For some of our readers this post may touch a nerve. Please know we write in a spirit of wanting desperately to see the story of Jesus magnified far above all other stories – fueled by recent days of hearing story after story of heartache …
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Would Jesus Spank?
We learned quickly in our home that not every child responds well to spanking. When we spanked our intense son Daniel he would glare daggers at us defiantly as if to say, “What good does hitting me do?” His spirit wasn’t “breaking” the way the …
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To Spank or Not to Spank?
We often get asked, “What about spanking?” Recently it was by a parent who had explained to her pastor that her daughter’s behavior was really frustrating and difficult. She told us that the pastor’s advice was brief and to the point. He said, “When she …
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Don’t Punish Your Child’s Nervous System — Understand It!
There are challenging kids, and there are “over-the-top” challenging kids. If standard parenting approaches just don’t work, or if you resonate with one or more of the comments below, you may well have an above average challenge with your child. If so – today’s parenting …
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The Gift of Not Giving: What Kids REALLY Want for Christmas
It’s not even Thanksgiving yet, but the Christmas aisles have been stocked for weeks already. Commercials for Black Friday “doorbusters” are rampant, and there is even controversy about some stores beginning their sales on Thanksgiving Day this year. The holiday materialism debate is not new: …
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Thankfulness in Three Dimensions
As we prepare for the upcoming day of “giving thanks”, take a moment to reflect on these three dimensions of thankfulness. First Dimension: Thankfulness for Blessings Big and Small When we think of thankfulness, we often give thanks for things — turkey, pumpkin pie, or …
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The Joy of Family Chores: A Tale of Two Moms
In a family, we all need each other. We are a team, and we share in the responsibility of the household. “God has arranged the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be” (1 Cor. 12:18). Each child …
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Dealing With Rejection: A Surprising Use for a $20 Bill
Kids are rejected from every side. Sometimes the rejection or criticism comes from a teacher that just doesn’t “get” your kid. Sometimes it comes from an angry family member. Sometimes it’s rejection from peers, gossiping, getting picked last in gym class. These daily rejections can …
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Do YOU Respect Authority?
This Election Day, there’s bound to be a candidate elected that you would rather not see take office. Or maybe an amendment that doesn’t go your way. The way parents respond when this happen speaks volumes to their kids! If we humble ourselves and pray (see 2 …
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