It can be hard work to grow as a parent. Especially when no matter how hard you try, things can still go haywire. Old patterns die hard, and it’s normal to fall into the default of huffing and puffing to…
When kids become teens, they start acting like they don’t need us. If we don’t understand why they’re doing this, and figure out ways to respond gracefully, we risk building resentment in the relationship. It helps to understand that teens…
Everyone would agree that loving our children is one of the most important things a parent can do. But sometimes expressing that love isn’t as easy as it sounds. Sarafina wrote about a breakthrough she had in learning to connect…
“I hate you!” There are certainly plenty of parents who have heard those disrespectful words. Some parents are deeply hurt (“I can’t believe you would say that, after all I do…”) while others get intensely angry (“It’s not okay to…
One of the biggest deterrents to effective discipline is that parents get upset. Then they use their big upset emotions to push outcomes. The younger kids are, the more this works to manage behavior. But over time, as kids tire of…
Secretly, deep down… Have you resented your child? Nobody wants to say they resent their child, but feelings persist against our wishes. Or maybe you’re disappointed that your child is… well, them. If yes, you’re being honest, and you’re expressing…
In our kitchen, there is a huge dent in the floor. I see it every day. It is a reminder to me of the day in which I learned something important about myself when it comes to discipline. It was…
For years I have struggled with the mess that our lively, spontaneous, creative, frequently disorganized children made at high speed. I used to call it “Trash and Dash.” Since their father has somewhat more “relaxed” standards of housekeeping than I…
In my role as a parenting speaker I do a lot of role plays with people in the audience. Though I had seen a lot of yelling, whining, and laughter from these role plays, I had never seen tears —…
