Category Discipline
Why You Don’t Need a New Parenting Strategy
John was fed up. He told me that everything he’d tried had failed. No matter what consequences or logic John put in place, his 6th grade son Ben just wouldn’t take responsibility for getting himself up and moving and out the…
Love – No Matter What!
For I am convinced that neither arguing nor defiance, neither sibling conflict nor disrespect, neither bad grades nor failure, neither whining nor lying, neither forgetfulness nor messes, nor any other misbehavior will be able to separate you from my love…
Why “It Is NOT OK to Talk That Way!” Doesn’t Work
There are many ways in which parents intentionally or unintentionally model positive character qualities: self-control, caring, diligence, faithfulness, etc. But we can also model negative character qualities, especially when we’re not thoughtful!
The Most Important Key to a Child’s Success
Pretty much every parent wants their children to succeed in life. When talking about teaching kids to be successful, parents often want to jump right to tactical issues like chores, homework, respect, and obedience. These are important issues, and we’ve written…
What Happens When We Approach Our Kids with an Empty Tank
Sometimes, especially when we’re stressed and our tank is on empty, it’s easy to approach kids with our needs instead of a full heart. We demand the good behavior that “fills our tank” instead of filling them with our love.…
Don’t Get Busted by Your Kids: Watch, Ask, and Listen!
A mother of five told us that her older children once “busted” her and her husband with an insightful observation: “We know you’re not listening when you say, ‘Wow, that’s great!’” The children were able to discern that the parents…
“It was hard to be mad when you were so kind to me.”
In my role as a parenting speaker I do a lot of role plays with people in the audience. Though I had seen a lot of yelling, whining, and laughter from these role plays, I had never seen tears —…
Want Kids to Value Your Advice? Try This.
Caroline was thoughtful as I described how our young adult kids call from time to time and ask us to help them think through a situation. “After they describe their dilemma, we usually ask them thoughtful questions to guide…
Why We’ll Never Stop Having Kids
Although I’m 62 and won’t be giving birth to any more children any time soon, I recently reflected that God gives us children in many ways, some biologically and some spiritually. It is a privilege to build into the…
How to Avoid Being Taken Hostage by Kids’ Demands
Parents sometimes feel like hostages to the intense demands of their children, intimidated into submission with the threat of “the big gun” – a deafening meltdown. One of our online course participants asked for help: Our 3 1/2 year old…