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Why You Don’t Need a New Parenting Strategy
John was fed up. He told me that everything he’d tried had failed. No matter what consequences or logic John put in place, his 6th grade son Ben just wouldn’t take responsibility for getting himself up and moving and out the…
Love – No Matter What!
For I am convinced that neither arguing nor defiance, neither sibling conflict nor disrespect, neither bad grades nor failure, neither whining nor lying, neither forgetfulness nor messes, nor any other misbehavior will be able to separate you from my love…
Don’t Get Busted by Your Kids: Watch, Ask, and Listen!
A mother of five told us that her older children once “busted” her and her husband with an insightful observation: “We know you’re not listening when you say, ‘Wow, that’s great!’” The children were able to discern that the parents…
“It was hard to be mad when you were so kind to me.”
In my role as a parenting speaker I do a lot of role plays with people in the audience. Though I had seen a lot of yelling, whining, and laughter from these role plays, I had never seen tears —…
Want Kids to Value Your Advice? Try This.
Caroline was thoughtful as I described how our young adult kids call from time to time and ask us to help them think through a situation. “After they describe their dilemma, we usually ask them thoughtful questions to guide…
Communicate Love to Your Kids. Use Words When Necessary.
When kids melt down, we often advise parents to respond with empathy, by saying out loud what the kiddo might be feeling. But sometimes we can communicate everything we need to — without words.
The Best Vacation Ever
Tom was worried about taking his family on a short mission trip to a South Dakota Indian reservation. He told me, “We’re really interested in this trip. We think it would be good for us and for our kids. But…
Skiing, Tears, and Grace
At a recent ski meet I found myself twice in tears for people I’ve never met. The first time was when a young competitor “skied out,” meaning he missed a gate and was disqualified from the race. Nearby his parents gasped…
Build Kids Up with Nourishing Affirmation in 30 Seconds
Kids need encouragement. But not all affirmation is created equal! Some affirmation is empty — like popcorn or cotton candy — but nourishing affirmation builds kids up by helping them see how their actions benefit others or build their character.…
Affirmation: The Struggle to Stay Positive [video]
“Stay positive.” It’s almost a cliche at this point. But the parenting truth behind this oft-spoken statement is that kids need constructive affirmation and encouragement from their parents. This might sound simple — but sometimes, affirming our kids can be…