Give the Gift of Connection
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Help Kids Handle “NO” by Getting Great at “YES!”
If you want your kids to respect and value your “no’s!” work harder on your “yeses!” It’s good to teach kids the various “No’s!” in life. The best foundation for doing this is to help them habitually experience the resounding…
How to Not Take Sides When Siblings Fight
In our family, one of the realities we face is siblings who fight. I tend to want to stop my children’s rivalry in its tracks, but I have found that I sometimes contribute to the problem rather than solve it. Ultimately, I really…
How to Turn a Parenting Fail into a Parenting Win
It was a Sunday evening. I was emotionally and physically done for the day and looking forward to a quiet house. Suddenly I overheard squabbling about who was the rightful owner of a large stuffed panda bear. My engagement with…
The most sure-fire road to respectful kids!
“Knock it off! Stop it! Get over here, NOW!” These are familiar phrases for most parents. When kids act up we get frustrated. We get demanding and even disrespectful. Kids may comply with our demands in the short run…
A Creative Alternative to Those Endless Reminders…
Big sister Bella bounces and crashes her way through life with Tigger-like abandon, unaware of the impact of her big movements and energy on those around her. When it came to pushing her new little brother in his baby…
The Benefits of Letting Our Kids Experience Conflict
Sometimes it can be a good thing to let kids fight. This played itself out last week as I was caring for my niece and nephews (4th – 7th grade). During dinner they began to argue the sort of argument…
How Your Support Helped a Child Learn to Take Her Own Time-Outs
“I wasn’t safe! I need to go to my room to think about this,” exclaimed five-year-old Selah after hitting her infant brother Caleb. It seemed almost miraculous that she would say such a thing.
An Often Overlooked Motivator of Good Behavior…
Many parents think that some sort of painful punishment is the best motivator for kids to improve their behavior. Other parents “focus on the positive” and offer rewards when kids do well. Research about what motivates workers to do well reveals…
When Kids Fight
How Fights are Reinforced…or Resolved If kids get a stern scolding, angry tones, harsh consequences, and nothing else from parents when they physically fight, then fighting is reinforced. This is because the combative mood is continued and modeled by the parents.…
How to Help Your Kids Like Each Other
At times, children naturally enjoy each other. But conflict is inevitable. If parents allow it, isolated conflicts can turn into a persistent rivalry with the power to dominate their children’s relationships with each other. In other words, if we wait for…