Category Foundation
Why “It Is NOT OK to Talk That Way!” Doesn’t Work
There are many ways in which parents intentionally or unintentionally model positive character qualities: self-control, caring, diligence, faithfulness, etc. But we can also model negative character qualities, especially when we’re not thoughtful!
Why We’ll Never Stop Having Kids
Although I’m 62 and won’t be giving birth to any more children any time soon, I recently reflected that God gives us children in many ways, some biologically and some spiritually. It is a privilege to build into the…
What to Do When You Dislike Your Child
During the very difficult years of early parenting, I would go through long times of despair, as well as periods of dislike for one or more of my children. I felt horribly guilty as well as angry with my family…
Tired of Not Feeling “Christian” Enough? This is for You.
“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart” (Jeremiah 29:13) I remember the sign on the men’s dorm wall during my freshman year at a Christian college. A spiritual disciplines checklist was posted…
Your Parenting Skills Are Not the Most Important Thing. This Is.
Jesus said that “smart carpenters” build a sturdy house on solid rock. Then when the storms of life hit, nothing will move the house. This doesn’t mean storms won’t pelt the house from time to time, and even inflict some…
Why Does Communicating “You are Safe” Matter?
Recently we received this excellent and thoughtful question from David, a long-time follower of Connected Families, about why we have “You are SAFE with me” as our foundational message for parents to communicate to children: Why is ‘safe’ the foundation…
How to Be a Safer Parent
Today we’d like to share with you a story from the blog of Bo, a dad who with his wife Jen took our online course and shared with us this beautiful story of their journey to become safer parents. We…
One of my favorite parenting videos
At Connected Families we teach that focusing on getting right behavior as your primary goal is a setup for power struggles and frustrations of all kinds. We teach instead to focus primarily on the messages your kids get from you…
“How can I be loving and supportive when I think my spouse is wrong?”
Recently we received this question from a mom in response to one of our posts. Q: When I watched the video about Jim and daughter Bethany’s conflict I realized that Lynne answered the phone but didn’t intervene. My impulse would…
How to Not Take Sides When Siblings Fight
In our family, one of the realities we face is siblings who fight. I tend to want to stop my children’s rivalry in its tracks, but I have found that I sometimes contribute to the problem rather than solve it. Ultimately, I really…